Why we’re homeschooling

I confess that it has been hard to answer the question, “Why are you homeschooling?”  It is often asked in passing, when we run into someone we haven’t seen recently.  A huge reason for the surprise and curiosity is that Ryan was in an excellent private, Christian school.  He was receiving a classical education (for which we, personally, paid a pittance thanks to help from my parents), being taught age-appropriate material in age-appropriate ways. His teachers clearly loved him.  They filled the days with lots of learning wrapped in fun – songs, movement, skits, etc.  And, best of all, his Nana Kay had her office in the adjacent building, meaning she could pop in and out of his classroom daily.  Truly ideal.

Except something wasn’t working for Ryan.  As he progressed from pre-K to Kindergarten to First Grade, we endured increasing meltdowns in the afternoon as soon as he got home.  He seemed extremely tired but had trouble winding down at night.  We started getting frequent calls from his teacher about his difficulty with fidgeting, staying in his seat, and even displaying a bad attitude when given some assignments.  His teacher implemented a number of creative strategies to try to help him, but his behavior seemed to deteriorate as the year went on.  By spring, we were baffled and all of us were spent, including Ryan. 

 

 

So, I suggested something I didn’t think I would personally ever be called to do (see Paragraph 1!): homeschooling.  We needed to hit the “reset” button on Ryan’s school experience.  It’s fair to say I know him better than anybody else on the face of the earth, but this was a side of him we hadn’t seen.  I wanted to know him as a student and answer some key questions:

1.  Is Ryan being asked to do things he isn’t physically ready to do?  (His physical/emotional development has always lagged behind his intellectual.) 

2.  Are we seeing signs of ADD/ADHD?  (There is a strong family history on both sides.)

3.  Does he have any sort of reading/learning disability? (His reading was slightly below grade level at the end of first grade.  That could mean something… or nothing.)  

4.  Is he bored? (Bright children who are not being challenged can become behavior issues in the classroom.)

5.  Are there any other contributing factors that we’re missing?  (Anxiety, bullying, etc.)

It would be nice to say that simply shifting learning to the home was a seamless process and answered all of the above questions instantly.  Of course, that was not the case. 

The first two months have given us a few pieces to the puzzle: Ryan needs frequent breaks, tires easily, and is very fidgety at home, too.  On the other hand, I am noticing subtle differences between the classic ADD/ADHD student and Ryan.  Learning at home is worse for him in some ways (The noise level is higher.) but better in others (Fidgeting and frequent breaks are fine.).  He has undergone a thorough reading evaluation, and we will receive those results soon. 

Working with him one-on-one has given me the chance to see unexpected areas of struggle and then to experiment with various approaches to help him.  I have read, sought advice, and prayed a lot!  I also discovered a major “contributing factor” that has helped us understand Ryan even better.  That’s deserving of another blog post entirely that I will share soon. 

So there is the “simple” answer to why we are homeschooling this year.  We do not know what each school year will bring, not just for Ryan but for our other children as well.  Parenting will never be one-size-fits-all!  We can only pray for the wisdom to know what each child needs and when he or she needs it the most.